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Affection Resistance and Rejection

Special Learning · First published 2011-03-25

One of the early signs of autism in children is a constant resistance or rejection of affection. The delays in the social development of autism can begin as early as infancy wherein the child might not make eye contact, which parents sometimes mistakenly take as deafness in their child when that develops as the child grows.

Bonding

Resistance is expressed by your child’s lack of enthusiasm for cuddling and forming interpersonal relationships, thus presenting the common notion about children with autism being in their “own world”. Isolation is evident in children with autism. Your child is likely to present this by engaging in solitary play. Without a way to connect, frustration can show up as crying, tantrums, or aggression.

Physical Contact

Discomfort with physical contact and grooming is common in children with autism. Rejecting physical contact can come in the form of not wanting to be in a crowded place where people are side by side and bumping into each other. This aversion to physical contact, unfortunately, leads to children with autism not wanting to be groomed. Hair brushing along with cutting hair and nails can commonly cause problems. When this happens, parents and caregivers can use techniques such as video modeling or social stories and picture cues to familiarize the child with grooming and show them what to expect.

Group Settings

Affection rejection may be intensified by past negative interactions, especially with school-age children who are able to communicate and somewhat socialize with others. An example would be rejected notions of acquiring friendships or being forced by a teacher to participate in a group activity. Always keep in mind that children with autism should never be forced to socialize.

Reading Other People

Children with autism can be oblivious to people’s feelings. Other people may read this as rudeness and avoid them. This makes children even more negative about social relationships, so it is important to expose your child to settings that are safe for your child’s social, emotional, and cognitive development.

Nonetheless, children with autism are still capable of forming bonds with their parents and surroundings. It does not always come naturally; it can be built. There are a variety of therapies that can help a child with autism and their parents to be able to develop a system for interaction. An example of such therapy is the Picture Exchange Communication System (PECS).

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